Showing posts with label dance. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dance. Show all posts

October 18, 2012

Adaptive sports "Buddies"?

Hannah has had her share of adaptive sports teams.   We've done Challenger Softball,  Miracle League, TopSoccer and Adaptive Dance in various towns.

While she somewhat enjoyed it, the programs seemed to be a bit flat.   There were some "helpers" who attended the entire season, but most of the volunteers would just come once or twice.  When Hannah was little, she wasn't going to latch on to a stranger.  She wasn't interested in a teenager who was there for the community service hours.   She did best when she had consistent volunteers who were around enough to build a relationship.

Still, even when the volunteers were top notch, they were way too nice.   Really, is it a good plan to let Hannah think she can make 15 goals in a row while the volunteer is faking missing the ball?  She doesn't need false success.  She needs skills.  She needs reality.  She definitely doesn't need more ego.   She has the highest self-esteem of anyone I know!  

It's not just volunteers...frequently it's parents who over-praise.

Superficial success is just ego stroking.  It doesn't teach anything of value.   Instead, provide realistic feedback.  Describe what you see: "I saw you running quickly to try to catch that ball." , "That was interesting!", "You were smiling out there."   Hold back on the "attagirl" comments.

This goes for more than sports--school work, art, playing games, chores, etc.
Describe that picture--honestly--"I see that you used a lot of blue."  (not:  I LOVE it!!  Thank you SO much!!)

I know that volunteers have the best intentions.  But making things too easy, too fabulous, too fun can be detrimental.

Praise is not encouragement.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This was spurred on by a comment by Hannah today.  She is in a noncompetitive homeschool league, which she enjoys.  It's much harder work to keep up with the other players.  They naturally accommodate Hannah's abilities, but she knows she's not as fast as the other kids.   Today she wanted to skip soccer.  We talked about it a bit.  Fortunately, I didn't want to go to soccer either, so she managed to win me over.   Not too much later she came to me and said, "I love TopSoccer" (the adaptive soccer program she was in a couple years ago).    I replied, "You liked that, didn't you?  But now you have a more challenging soccer team.  Did you like TopSoccer or did you just like Coach Keith? (who happens to be a firefighter--Hannah's dream job)"    She replied, "I always got goals at TopSoccer."  

Of course, I don't want my daughter to feel like a failure, but I do want her to own her abilities.  I don't want any of my children to feel that they are The Best at Everything.

Hannah's favorite and reliable Buddy, AKA Daddy




May 27, 2011

Re-defining Down Syndrome


A week or two ago Sheena (Hannah's friend and dance instructor) asked permission to write a post about Hannah.   Of course I was pleased; I was also curious.

I was almost expecting something about how Hannah was a "joy"--something a bit fluffy and superficial.  I've had years of people telling me how sweet/happy/adorable she is.  Everyone enjoys hearing nice things about their child; I am no different.  But frequently I hear a twinge of condescension in their voices.  stereotyping.  The old, "Those Down syndrome people are SO happy." line is not only old, but also inaccurate.

Am I jaded?

Probably.

My teen-aged person with Down syndrome is concrete, irritable, enthusiastic, crabby, obstinate, feisty, effervescent, exasperating, lovable, temperamental, funny, true, annoying, imaginative, entertaining, and 100% lovable.
Pretty much the same as everyone else with 46 chromosomes.

I know Sheena "gets" Hannah. I knew she'd have something valuable to share about her friendship/mentor-ship with Hannah.  I wasn't really worried about Sheena writing platitudes of sweetness, milk and honey.

My baggage of preconceived ideas of how people see Hannah shouldn't come into play.  Really, I'm just doing the same thing that they do.  If the worst pet peeve I've got regarding Down syndrome is society's inaccurate image of "happy people", then I ought to just be quiet about it.   It's just a slight annoyance, not a horrific problem.

(BTW, I think the worst thing society does is have low expectations.)

Anyway, back to Sheena.  She wrote her blog post. And it's interesting and amazing.

I cannot thank her enough for just thrusting Hannah into her dance class.  It seems to me that she orchestrated the best possible classroom environment possible--a variety of open-minded peers, incremental teaching, patience, high expectations, encouraging instruction.   And, I assumed, some sort of modified choreography.  But I learned from Sheena's blog that she didn't change a thing for Hannah.

Sheena's post isn't so much about what she has done for Hannah.  In fact, it's about what Hannah has done for Sheena.  That was what surprised me.

It reminds me of when Hannah was a baby, how I discovered that Hannah is a great teacher.  She led the way through all the murky medical and emotional waters we navigated.  I've sort of forgotten how much she's taught me, after all, I do fancy myself a teacher.

Make a visit to Sheena's blog.  See what she's got to say about Down syndrome defining someone's capabilities.



May 22, 2011

Dance when you think nobody is lookin'

Today is the recital. Twice.  Hannah was very excited yesterday, even after a VERY long rehearsal (waiting for 2.5 hours to dance for 2 minutes).   She had never been on a stage this large before, and she only had one chance to try it out!  So today's task is to hang out at the Landmark Theater from noon to 8:00 p.m. and still be smiling.  




Tomorrow we leave for our annual trip to the beach!!  Two weeks (almost)!!   We had to shave off a couple days so Hannah could perform.  It was totally worth it, as you could see from yesterday's bit of joy-induced improvisation.

But by tomorrow morning all the dancing dreams will be replaced by visions of SPF, sand, salt and sun...




Oh yeah.  And sharks.

May 7, 2011

Dancer

It's two weeks until Hannah's dance recital.   This is her first dance recital, on a huge stage, with bright lights, and she is totally excited about it!

This was Hannah's first year in a regular dance class.  She was the only "new" student in the class, so she had a lot of catching up to do. She's learned so much from her teacher, Sheena, and from her friends in the class!  I could not have envisioned a better environment for her!  I was expecting some frustration or annoyance from her classmates--I mean, really, most of them are middle schoolers, with a few high schoolers in the mix as well.  But there hasn't been a single issue with any of them. They have been so very patient with Hannah.

Aren't they all beautiful?


Last week it was Picture Day at the dance studio.  I was rather dreading it.  I was imaging it to be a bit like one of those pageant TV shows.  We had instructions for hair and makeup. Hair?  She can't stand to have her hair pulled tight, but we did manage to get in a bun without too much drama.  Makeup?  On a 13 year old?   A 13 year old who isn't interested in makeup?  She was much more interested with her swirly dress!








We'll see how the pictures come out.   When Hannah is told to smile, she usually ends up with a grimace.  We usually have to make her laugh to get a real smile out of her, and then her mouth is usually open.

The girls got the chance to rehearse in their costumes.  This is good because they all get distracted with how fabulous they look in the mirrors and how different it is to dance in a skirt than a leotard.



Hannah knows all her steps, but her timing is just a smidgen behind the rest of the dancers.  She tries her best, and that's just fine.

Hannah is the farthest dancer in blue at the beginning of this video clip.


She's so happy when she's dancing!

October 31, 2010

#29/31 Dancin' with Nan

I'm'a gonna have to change my password or something--obviously someone has hijacked this blog!!  Clearly someone else besides me loves this Nanabird.

Did you know that the Cherokee people had seven clans?  We decided that Hannah would've been a member of the Bird Clan.


If there was Dance Clan, she'd opt for that one, she loves it so.

Visitors are welcome to the last five minutes of Hannah's dance class.  I take the opportunity to video the class so Hannah can review the music and movements. She's coming along, regularly a half-beat behind, but she's getting better.

This is a routine they've been working on for a few weeks. It's not yet complete. Hannah loves it because the music comes from Toy Story 3 and all the dancers are pretending to be toys/dolls.

Hannah is the one wearing all black except for a white waistband from her shorts. She's on the opposite side from where I was filming, so I mostly have her reflection in the mirror.

October 19, 2010

#19/31 Dance!

It's Tuesday.   Hannah's favorite day.   She's busy getting her chores done so we can finish up her schoolwork.  She has a lot to do before we leave the house this afternoon.   But she's working hard.  And fast.  Motivation is a wonderful thing!

She has her theater class at 4:30.   That used to be her favorite activity.

But not any more.

Right after theater is over, she changes into her dance clothes.   She gets so excited!   Dance starts at 6:30, so we scurry to get some dinner out and get to the studio.

All of the girls in her class have had a year (or many more) years of dance.   The class is fast-paced for a beginner.   Her teacher has Hannah do everything the other dancers are doing, and helps her focus on learning some basic steps, but she doesn't expect any beginner to be able to do all the moves.


Hannah comes out of class feeling very successful.    She loves it.   Me too.