It's that time of the year....

Girl Scout Cookies....

Love them and hate them.

I am not a good accountant. And I always seem to forget or misplace someone's order (sorry Jennifer C.!). I should put a forgiveness clause on the order form. The good news is that we still have a month to fix things if I screw them up.

Fortunately, Hannah is a little more motivated and organized than I am. So far she has sold 14 cases of cookies. That's much more manageable than the 38 she sold a couple years ago.

Hannah was ready--this year we made our tags early, and instead of torturing her to make 50 thank-you notes, we just copied them and cut them out. She was in charge of cutting, hole punching and the ribbons.

I copied the orders onto the back of the tags, and she filled the bags and tagged them.



I supervised and did quality assurance tests on the products. Who'd have guessed that Tagalongs are still the tastiest?


We knocked out more than half of the orders in 30 minutes.

Now to deliver them.

Now somebody put that kid to bed--it's 10 p.m. and I need to eat more cookies.

Laggardly

All right.

I've been shirking my responsibilities around here. There has been nothing interesting or humorous in my life lately I guess (unless you count last night's Mom's Night Out and the discussion about shaving...but I don't think I need to document that on the internet).

News in the household includes Chris flying to St Croix yesterday! There were a few potential glitches that did not materialize, for which I am exceedingly grateful. I am assuming that no news is good news, and that Opa and Chris are now gearing up (literally) for their first scuba dive of the week!

After Hannah's camera went into mystery seclusion a few months ago, and my Nikon D40 drowned, I was camera-less for a bit. So I rationalized the purchase of another digital camera, thinking I'd get my Nikon fixed at some point (just to get it looked at is $250). I told Chris it was technically his camera, that he could take to college in the fall. Of course, I never let him touch it. Until yesterday. So now he has "his" camera to document the beautiful Caribbean. And I don't.

But.

The amazing thing is that Hannah found her camera! Apparently she put it in her Christmas purse (shiny black patent leather clutch) to keep it safe. And it was. And is.

This is generally my approach when I lose something in the house. I lose it, and assume it will find it's way to to surface at some point. Usually, I do give a cursory search. But if it isn't where I look, I just give up. It shows up on its own, or I end up replacing it. Of course, as soon as I replace it, it reappears and makes me feel foolish.

Case in point: Remember how Hannah was working on all those Girl Scout Badges? Well, we had made great progress, and I kept all her work and documentation in the large 237 page spiral bound Badge Book, which has all the badge requirements listed. She had completed about 75% of five badges. And then I cleaned the kitchen. Or, more likely, I shuffled the kitchen. And the book went missing. I had a theory that the book (and the work) went into the recycling. It didn't surface. And it didn't surface. And I secretly was suspicious that The-One-Who-Is-Tidy (certainly that's not me) might have "cleaned" it. After a month with no book, and no progress on the badges (yay! another reason to procrastinate!), I decided to buy a new book, figuring that the old one would definitely materialize promptly, and I could return the new one.

But it didn't.

I have this desk in my kitchen (but in black):

(and now, coincidentally, I can't find Hannah's camera, so here's a Pottery Barn stock photo)

I keep all of Hannah's homeschool stuff in the bottom cabinets, and my cookbooks and current library books on the shelves above. In the middle, where I can hide everything, I have piles of junk. Phone books, my expired coupon collection, loose recipes, catalogues, seed packets, mail that I want to save (for no apparent reason), odds and ends, piles of post-it notes that no longer stick, balloons, and tons of other stuff. I don't even know what's there, because I keep it closed. I peek, once in a while. And I shuffle things into it. We've been in this house for 18 months and I have never really removed anything from it. I just add to it. And it's pretty much full. (Understatement font.)

I decided I'd search for the old book. And I looked. Honest I did. I looked in the desk. And my other desk. And all the bookshelves. And other places too. And so did Chris and James. But we didn't find it.

So I started to recreate Hannah's work. And started writing in the new book. And I didn't like it one bit. So I quit. And we were in stasis. Me, Hannah, and the Girl Scout Badges. And the end of the Girl Scout year is fast approaching, and I have no documentation.

And then, three days ago, Voila! I open the desk, and there, sitting on top of the phone books, was the original badge book!

"No way!", you say.

And I reply, "Way."

The lesson that I take from this is that I am rewarded when I procrastinate.

And now we have to cram the rest of those badge requirements in to the next 6 days. And I saved the really difficult ones for the last. Because I'm smart like that.

I hope this dispells that vicious internet rumor that I am an organized person.

The good news is that soon you will likely be treated to more of Hannah's random photographic endeavors. If we find the camera again. And buy new batteries.

P.S. Lookie there--I have a new widget about the Bone Marrow Registry. Please register--it is so easy and would normally cost about $100, but now it's FREE for the next 10 days!

So far so good for today

For those of you awaiting the outcome of Hannah's "challenging" Girl Scout troop, I have good news! 

I just got an email from the field supervisor (whatever that is) and she has a new troop for Hannah!  I have not yet spoken to the troop leader, but I am excited for a new beginning for Hannah. Here's hoping for a fresh start!

It's pouring down rain (again) today, and we're holed up awaiting the refrigerator repairman (problem with the water/ice dispenser).   We had a good morning of school, which we've been neglecting for quite a while.  Hannah is making good progress with her GS badge requirements.  She is also working on counting money, so we set up a penny candy store (M&Ms and fruit snacks) and took turns with a handful of change.  We've been working on skip counting as well (2,4,6,8, etc), so it was a fun activity to pull everything together.   I think we'll set up a grocery store soon to review 10s and dimes.

Yesterday Hannah received a package from Maman (my mother).  It was a set of books--The Pet Fairy books.  Hannah was SO excited!  Kate recommended the Rainbow Fairy books for Hannah because she babysits a girl who just loves them.  They are beginning chapter books, similar in difficulty to Magic Tree House.  These are the first chapter books that Hannah will read independently.  She still prefers to read chapter books together, but she likes these fairies' adventures so much she will read by herself.   She's just now starting the first of the Pet Fairy books while I'm on the computer.  If I leave her waiting long enough she might just read the whole book!

 
Today is Chris' last day of classes at the community college!  He has two exams on Thursday and then he's done!   He still has to work on his German (on the computer), but he is pretty close to completing everything! 

Kate has just a couple of weeks left of school (lots of papers and exams...ugh...I remember it well, even though it was 23 years ago!). We are in the early stages of preparing for our trip to Minnesota for her graduation over Memorial Day weekend.  Hannah is very excited to go to the Mall of America to see the American Girl store there.  She has been saving money and gift certificates since Christmas.  I guess we'd better bring an extra suitcase for the doll paraphernalia.  Also on Hannah's list is visiting Kate's boyfriend's house.  Hannah has been wanting to play an electric guitar for years (Thanks Murray Wiggle) and John has a few...he plays guitar in his band Bright Lights and Heroes.  When Hannah first asked for an electric guitar I told her she had to be a teenager first.  So she's been counting down the months.  22 to go.  Save me.

I've got bread dough rising in the warm oven--makes for a cozy house!  It feels like a weekend, but it's only Tuesday. How does that happen?

 

Etc.

Thank you everyone for your kind and helpful comments to the Girl Scout situation. I am so thankful for this blogging community--for your ideas, outrage, encouragement, tears, and compassionate responses. Each comment helped me feel better about what happened, and helped me to form my course of action. I also was able to help Hannah move past it too.

Today I finally have time to call the local GS Council to speak with the person who is in charge of placement. I'm not expecting anything great, but at least I'll have the opportunity to have my/Hannah's say.

I also decided that Hannah will finish out the year with this troop. She and I went through the badge book and chose about 6 badges to tackle. We are going to use these as the bulk of Hannah's schoolwork for the last 6 weeks of school (yes, we end in May!). I figured that at the end-of-year ceremony (if they have one), she will at least receive something. She is excited about this. We started on the Safety First badge (she is a little bit compulsive about safety issues, so this is right up her alley). Part 1 of the badge completed. So far so good.

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Our Friday trip to Yorktown (primarily for helping a friend at her daughter's IEP) was fun! We hadn't been back in the area for quite a while so it was fun to see old friends. Time passes so quickly with friends! And we get to return, since we chose not to sign the IEP...the placement setting was completely innapropriate for this child. It makes me steam when school systems choose to use "policy" rather than common sense to make decisions about a child's education. It's not like we don't notice!! Anyhow, another day, another meeting.

It must be IEP season--in the past few days I've been inundated with preschool parents who are battling with various school systems. It's just craziness. This is not a process that benefits families or children.

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Saturday was Opening Day for the Miracle League! Usually James takes Hannah to all her baseball games, but he had to work on a Habitat House, so I took her. Of course, I didn't take a camera (mine is such a pain with the batter issue, and Hannah's is still MIA). Something blogworthy always happens when I am ill prepared! Hannah was at bat for the Phillies, bases loaded (which they always are in the Miracle League--you keep trying to hit the ball, either pitched or on the T, until you succeed). On her first pitch she connected--hard! Bam! All the way to the far centerfield! She made a home run! In the second inning, the same situation, first pitch--but this one went all the way to the woods! Out of the park! The crowd went wild! (at least, I did. And the crowd did cheer her on.) She was SO PROUD!

We had a neighborhood block party in the afternoon and she told everyone about her Grand Slams!

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Sunday afternoon was soccer, then swimming at the gym. Chris and I are in training for his Scuba trip in June, so while we did laps with flippers and snorkels, James and Hannah played in the big pool. Hannah and I also did some gardening. We made string/bamboo fencing for the peas to climb, planted peppers and parsley (can't wait to get some more caterpillars!), and tidied up the raspberry canes. Radishes and carrots are doing well, as are the strawberries. I didn't replace the broccoli Bunsen ate, but he apparently enjoys pepper plants as well, since he unearthed several of the seedlings, eating a few. Maybe I should plant some jalapenos? Do you think the stems and leaves are spicy? He needs to learn a lesson.


The Guilty Party.

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Mondays are our busiest day. Hannah has two morning classes at our local Homeschool Enrichment Center. She loves her art class. This session they are celebrating holidays around the world. This week they made posters about Earth Day. Hannah made hers about saving trees. I was proud when she helped a student spell "recycle". It's not a spelling word I taught her, but she knows a song by Tom Chapin called "R-E-C-Y-C-L-E". Fortunately she did not try to sing the song (if I haven't mentioned enough that the girl cannot carry a tune, here's another opportunity for me to say so). If you go to Tom's site, you can hear one of Hannah's all-time favorite songs on his playlist "You're Not the Boss of my Brain". It's kind of her theme song...also on the site is a YouTube video of Tom singing "Not on the Test", which is highly motivational for homeschoolers, but depressing for the country.

In Botany class she learned about how plants make their own energy. I think she suprised her classmates by coming up with the word "photosynthesize". Thanks to Billy Jonas, another of her favorite children's entertainers, she already knew a little bit about it!

Hannah's Dance movement class is on Monday afternoons. She LOVES it. She is excited because her teacher (who has a 2 year old with Ds) is pregnant--with Twins! Hannah is fascinated with pregnancy and babies.

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CPAP update: We've had a few ups and downs, with me sleeping in her room once since our first victory. For the most part she's keeping the mask on through the entire night. She has a bell on her nightstand, which she needed just once. Somehow one of her velcro straps came loose, so she needed me to help. She's been getting about 9 hours of sleep each night, which is fine.

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Signing off with one of Hannah's new jokes:

Q: What did the dentist give the Marching Band?

A: A Tuba Toothpaste.

I'm out of sorts

Hannah is a Junior Girl Scout. Before we moved to the Richmond area she was in a great Brownie Troop. I didn't realize how good it was until she joined a troop here. It took us a year to find a troop that was accepting Scouts. So Hannah joined in January.

It's an odd conglomeration of troops--there are about 4 or 5 Juniors, 3-4 Cadettes, and a few seniors. There are many troop leaders, all of whom are apparently very close. I made the decision not to get too involved with Hannah's group because I want her to have the chance to be more independent. She's with me more than enough, and we both can use some time apart. I stay at the church where they meet, but I go read in another room, or find something helpful to do that isn't interfering with her group. I discussed Hannah's abilities and challenges with the troop leader, and felt that she understood that Hannah should, and could, be fully included in activities. Of course I offered to help if she needed it, but explained that I was hoping to let Hannah chart her own course in the troop.

In 4 months, I think that the Juniors have worked on part of one badge. The rest of the time they spend helping the older girls with their endeavors, which seem to be crafts for Tea Parties. This troop likes to invite Brownie and Daisy troops to Tea Parties. They spend several meetings making crafts (painting pine cones into flowers...?? Making Japanese fans and origami? For three or four meetings in a row?). Then there is the actual tea party, where 20-30 little girls come to learn etiquette and gorge themselves on all kinds of food which the troop supplies. They never have any kind of opening or closing ceremony at any meeting. They never do any kind of flag ceremony, or any "Girl Scout-y" things.

This is all fine, I suppose, but it isn't what we were expecting from Girl Scouts. The scouts and leaders are welcoming enough. But they just don't get it. Hannah wants to be a part of the group. She wants to contribute. For the first Tea Party, Hannah arrived in her "hostess" clothes, as requested. However, she never got to do anything. They ended up telling her to go sit with the Daisies and Brownies.

I wasn't happy with that (Hannah is as tall as an average 12-13 year old--and she was 10), she doesn't need to be with 5-7 year olds. I'm not at all about appearances, but really, it doesn't work to put the only kid with a disability in with the little kids. I could tell she felt awkward, not only because she was the only one who was dressed to "work", but because she didn't know anyone at the table and she was so big. But the main point is, she wasn't included in her troop.

I let that one slide. But when I learned that they were planning another tea party, I repeatedly requested ways for Hannah to participate--certainly she can serve snacks and pour tea. Certainly she can bake goodies and bring them, just like her troopmates. The leaders promised to email me or call me with assignments. And even when I emailed them, two weeks ago, I got nothing other than, "Oh, don't worry, we have everything we need." The Tea Party was tonight. I got my first phone message at 4 p.m., saying that Hannah could bring some rice if she wanted (???rice??). I decided that Hannah didn't want to bring rice (who brings rice to a tea party?)--We didn't have time to fix anything appropriate, so she went empty-handed. It was not a problem--there was a big spread of treats (and no rice).

When we arrived this evening, they whisked Hannah down the hall--I assumed to have her get to her post. She did help check in the party guests. I stayed around for a while, but I needed to run an errand. When I came back, I was surprised that Hannah was, again, a guest at the tea party. She had her back to me, so I could observe the situation without having to reveal myself. Ugh. They were so patronizing to her. Everyone was treating her as if she was five years old. It made my stomach drop.

When we started the IEP process when Hannah was 3, we made up a list of Hannah's strengths and weaknesses. One of the threats to Hannah's development we listed was "The low expectations of others."

While we've had small instances of low expectations, with a particular Sunday School teacher, or an occasional incident with a store clerk or neighbor, this is the first time I can think of an entire group of people I know negating Hannah's abilities. And it pisses me off. And I hurt for her.

When she was first born, of course I convinced myself that we'd have the brightest and best child with Down syndrome ever. Over the years, we've gotten off our high horse and re-tooled our expectations to have the brightest and best Hannah ever. Boy do we love her!

Nobody wishes pain on their children. I remember, in those early years, deliberating...would it be easier for Hannah to not know that she's different? If she didn't have the ability to understand her disAbility, would she be happier? If she's aware enough to know about how she's different, how and why it's hard for her to learn, aware enough to understand taunts and teases and cruelty, is that a good thing? It is, if we want her to be competent enough to live independently. So, of course, to be the Best Hannah, we have to expose her to the pain.

As I kissed her good night, I asked her if she liked being a guest at the tea party, or would she rather have worked at the tea party. She said that she'd like to have done both. She cried a little. She's no dummy. She knows what is going on.

I don't know where this leaves us. I think we'll probably have to stick it out until the end of this school year. Hannah's not going to want to quit. And I'll have to try to negotiate my way through the clique of leaders and make them understand they need to give her a chance. I'd rather just quit. But that doesn't do anyone any good.

As I've been writing this, I've been feeling as if I'm not quit able to fully tell the story. I wasn't sure where I was going with this post, other than to vent. And I'm not sure I'm saying anything of value, or that I've said what I wanted to say. I've let it sit overnight, and I'm still not sure whether I should post it "as is", or let it simmer a little. But, onto the blog it goes--I've got go out of town for the day, so no time to wallow.

Thanks for letting me have my own little pity party.

Thin Mint?

Hannah has joined Girl Scouts again! It took over a year to find a troop, but she's now a very proud Junior in Troop 226!

Of course, her first meeting was all about cookie sales, which start on Wednesday...so if you're in the mood for a cookie (or several boxes!), you know where to find her (or me, and I'll pass on the info).